There were a whole bunch of us kids, who grew into teenagers, who grew into adults. I guess its still happening now, and will continue to happen for decades, what with the extensiveness of the Smith family. I was always glad to have so many cousins close to my age. Kelly and Shannon were indisputably closest to Alice, but at times gangs of us would come together, not quite friends, not quite siblings, but joined nevertheless by strong bonds of family. During Christmases in Kempsey and cold winter days in Canberra we would congregate in giggling groups. The banks of the Macleay river were riddled with adventure. We swung on ropes and tramped through towering bamboo. Our imaginations ran riot. We played games for hours I can no longer remember the plots of, but they were packed with fun. Later, Alice came to visit Kempsey by herself, I think when she was around 14, but I can't be sure. I was teetering on the brink of adolescence. I wore sneakers and t-shirts everywhere. I was a dag without an inch of style. I was embarrassed by my height - I towered over my classmates. My tall and beautiful cousin Alice came to Kempsey with her platform shoes and white, stretch pants and mature, cool, and sophisticated air. Suddenly I wasn't so disappointed with being tall. I wanted to be taller. I wanted to be just like her. An age gap of nearly 4 years is a big deal when you're a kid, and sometimes a bigger deal when you're a teenager. As a 12 year old I admired my older cousins. They were cool and they knew a lot more about the world than I did. I'd try to act like a grown-up when around them, pretending I knew what they were talking about, and amazed by their worldview. Something that saddens me the most is that I never had the chance to know Alice as an adult. When she died I had only seen her briefly a few times in the last 5 years or so. I was just starting out on my adult life, and hers was over. Mark, Karen, Julian, James and Robbie I am so sorry for your loss and I cannot begin to imagine what it must be like to lose a child or a sibling. You have shown me what family togetherness and strength really mean. Love, Diana